Sunday, August 10, 2008

Sundate and the Rug

Today was Sundate, my half-day of rest. MP and I had a few hours of adult time while the Empress hung out with grandma. I got dressed like a grown up and we had brunch at the Hyatt Regency. The atmosphere was very relaxing and I had a whole meal without indigestion. I even took a few photos of the yummy looking dessert area though I was too full for sweets. Anyone who knows me knows I love chocolate but alas I had no room. Today is also day two of what I am referring to as "tough love". Simply put, I am tired of tantrums, scratches and kicks and the message is that it's not okay. We are the proud new owners of a "Time-Out Spot" rug (safer for us than a chair and portable) and we have already used it twice today. Tomorrow I will buy an egg timer as an added reminder and warning. We are going by the age rule so our time-outs are 2 minutes long provided the undesired behavior stops. Emme is absolutely brilliant and I am amazed at all her receptive skills. I believe these issues are mostly her frustration due to her inability to communicate so I hope with an increase in language and/or signs/gestures we will see a decrease. She is incredibly adaptable though I try my best not to set her up for failure. I don't bring her places with unreasonable expectations (like a restaurant at 7pm) and try and be prepared with a bag of tricks. She is not at all bothered my stimulation (i.e. an amusement park) and does best when in social situations which is surprising given the amount of time she is home. Overall, she is doing amazing and I am confident we will get through the rest together

10 comments:

Chinazhoumom said...

Good for you - I to held tight to time out or - go to your room as I don't wish to hear your crying - and when you feel better you can coem out (put her in control of when she felt like calming down) and yep sometimes it took a min or 2 and sometimes longer...This too shall pass ! and just like you said as she gets the words she can tell you what is going on..
Good Luck!
Carol in FL

Eliza2006 said...

The beginning of the summer was rough around here. I decided I was tired of the constant crying and tantrums. There was one morning where Eliza was in time out at least 5 times before noon. It didn't take long. She hasn't had to go to time out in over a month. Now I can tell her, "either do this by yourself or I will help you do it by the time I count to three". Boy, does that work. Life is easier around here...for now.

Tiffany

MotherMotherOcean said...

This is going to be a good step in the right direction for you all. I never want to be sent to your naughty rug.

Anonymous said...

I think you are doing great!! She is a doll!

April
http://milesandmilestomylei.blogspot.com

Beverly said...

what a great idea.

Michele said...

It sounds like you've figured out how to teach her what is acceptable and what is not. Good for you.

Bring the time out rung if you need to. I'm sure all of the kids will need it one time or another this weekend.

Twice Blessed China Mom said...

Lisa, you're sounding like a confident mom these days. Good for you to take on the behavior issues quickly. I did the same with my younger daughter. Life was very difficult with her for way too long, but I figured I'd deal with the behavior at some point; no better time than today. A dear friend of mine with 6 children (4 bio and 2 adopted) shared a lot of her parenting ideas with me. She said that she was training her kids at two for the future when they would be teenagers. I hope that is what I'm doing now, as well. Certainly there will always be training that needs to be done, but I think we're covering a lot of bases I'm hoping we won't need to when they're teens!!! Hopefully they are learning that my word means something; whining is ineffective, cooperation goes a long way in a family, mom believes in Love and Logic, and problem solving skills are good to have...and about 100 more!!!

kris said...

You're such a MOM :O)

Carol said...

Love reading your blog....pictures are wonderful.

There are now time-out bears. A huggable bear with a built in timer in the tummy. I think they are cute and will probably get one for Emily......who is testing me too.......

Fliss and Mike Adventures said...

Ok... she is still an angel... but glad you are standing your ground... I am sure that in time things will be fine... just remember to what it was like in China.... like I said... she is still an angel... :)