Today I proudly accepted the referral of who I affectionately call "peanut". I don't know exactly how it happened; when, why or how but somewhere, somehow it was decided for me. Yesterday I decided to leave it to fate in that if it was meant to be it would be. I knew her file was to be unlocked yesterday at 11:12am and there was a good chance today would be gone; gone to another wanting to build a family through adoption. I got ready for work and drove in silence knowing I wanted to make her mine. I got to work and there was email telling me her file had been re-locked until noon tomorrow. I made the decision right then, right there that I wanted to be this little girl's mother; for better, for worse, for eternity. So I submitted my LOI, Family Treatment Plan and bad-ass, mug-shot passport photo and off I go. Now we wait.